It's 1 a.m. the following night .... same thing....
It's 3 a.m. the following night .... same thing....
It's 4 a.m. the following night .... same thing....
And so goes nearly every night. It's has gotten to the point where when that door opens, half asleep with eyes barely able to see, the precious little one... the prayer begins... "Jesus, be with Austanne. Let her know you are right beside her, hold her, comfort her, and take away those bad dreams! In Jesus name, Amen!"
Yes, praying for my little girl in the middle of the night while I am half asleep... I like to think I am some great wonderful mother who wants to see my baby girl grow to be some wonderful spiritual woman in the Lord.... not that that is NOT want I want (because I do want that)... but in all honesty.... at those early a.m. hours, I am just thinking I want to get some sleep!
But the job of a mother never ends. Whether it's 1 a.m. being up with a child who is scared.... 4 a.m. consoling a child who seen a little too much Baby Einstein and thinks the polar bears are eating her feet ..... or up all night with 5 sick children who are going in 20 minute intervals of turns between vomiting, blowing up the toilet or just crying how miserable they are.... it just never ends!
Sometimes being a Mommy may not be what was envisioned as a little girl! I don't know about you, but I envisioned these wonderful children, who enjoyed their Mommy! Children who wanted to snuggle up and play together! I envisioned children who actually said nice things and looked cute always! I envisioned children who went to bed at 8 p.m. and slept all night until 8 a.m......
Then reality hit.... I have children who cry! I have babies who do not like men, only women (which leaves me stuck with a whiny cranky baby who does not want Daddy!) I had children who tell me when they go potty "Mommy! Go! I can do it!" only to discover they sure did it alright - filled the toilet with a whole roll of toilet paper - or even worse, explored how many washcloths could fit in the toilet before the water came pouring out! Yes, it is not what I had envisioned! Bugger wiped on the wall behind the toilet for the young boy who just could not manage to blow his nose, but rather pick it while he went pee standing.... and left the treat for later! Yes, I have children who I get dressed up all nice and clean who go outside 5 minutes before we leave and look like they just came out of a coal mine because they decided to go dig for worms for the fish...... yes, this is what motherhood has brought me!
But these children are my children! They are the children God has blessed me with.... some days I wonder why, but yes, these are the ones God gave me! He has a reason, a purpose in WHY He chose ME to be their mother, a reason why He did not choose Jane or Sue down the street..... why He chose to bless me with my children so close in age even though I thought "boy it sure would be nice to make it a whole year without getting pregnant!" Yes I am thankful.....
The days sometimes are long, the hours are not the best, and the pay (in dollars) is not good (I get a penny or dime if I am lucky here and there).... but the days are VERY rewarding! The hours of snuggles, hugs and kisses are amazing! and the pay.... well it may not be in dollars but its amazing! I get paid in drawings, castles made out of legos, and beautiful letters written to me out of the deepest most treasured parts of the heart! I am truly blessed beyond all measure!
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The Lord delights in the way of the man whose steps he has made firm; though he stumble, he will not fall, for the Lord upholds him with his hand. Psalms 37:23-24 NIV
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